A good childhood friend of mine, Davie Mwangi, recently celebrated his birthday in early January—a time that often feels like a new beginning for everyone, let alone the birthday boy. Keeping it simple with an in-house celebration, Davie used his welcome remarks to appreciate all of us, sharing how he knows each of us and why he thinks we’re important in his life.
Intrigued by his reflections, I couldn’t resist asking him, “Why?” And then, “Why again?” Most people in the room didn’t quite understand my line of questioning until I explained The 5 Whys—a problem-solving method I’ve grown to appreciate as a researcher. This technique involves repeatedly asking “Why?” to dig deeper into the root cause of an issue. But that evening, those “Whys” made Davie reflect on his friendships—their origins, their purposes, and their future.
It was a powerful moment of shared introspection.
The Purpose of Friendship
One of our friends and Davie’s closest friend JKing Ngare took the moment a step further, asking each of us to write down and share two things:
- What we wished Davie to achieve in his new year.
- How we planned to support him in reaching those goals.
This exercise was revealing. As we shared our thoughts, it became clear that most of us had expressed what we secretly wanted for ourselves. Our unfulfilled ambitions and purposes surfaced in what we hoped for Davie. It dawned on me that true friendships often serve as mirrors—reflecting our own dreams, values, and potential.
Friendship, at its core, is about cheering others on until your time comes. It’s about being the kind of person who helps someone else find their “Why,” knowing that, in turn, you might find yours.
The Role of Friends in Finding Your Why
Personally, I owe much of who I am to my friends. They’ve been instrumental in helping me find my purpose. From a young age, they encouraged me to hone my talents, offering honest feedback and unwavering support. Early in my career, this clarity led me to define myself as a Creative Thinker on LinkedIn—not by the job titles I’ve held, but by the essence of who I am.
Yet, many people go through life without finding their purpose. This isn’t always their fault.
- Parents often impose their unfulfilled dreams on their children, shaping their paths around what they wished to achieve.
- The system, too, has its flaws, stifling creativity and failing to nurture talent through inadequate infrastructure and misplaced priorities.
But despite these challenges, finding your “Why” is essential. It allows you to live a fulfilling life, one where happiness becomes contagious and inspires those around you.
What’s Your Why?
Davie’s birthday celebration was a reminder that life is best lived with purpose—and that friends play a vital role in helping us uncover it.
So, I’ll leave you with this:
- Do you know your “Why”?
- Are you living a life that fulfills you and serves your purpose?
- And if not, what’s stopping you?
Finding your “Why” isn’t just about personal fulfillment. It’s about being part of something bigger—a generation that not only dreams of progress but also actively contributes to it.
Here’s to friendships, purpose, and the pursuit of a meaningful life.
